Grandes Exitos de InuYasha
by Valen.lluvia.danzante
Summary: nada, solo lo mas gracioso de varios fics que lei
1. Chapter 1

I got a review alert a while ago, so I want to clear some of the doubts. These are not my fanfics, they were written by different authors (can't really remember names, sorry!) and they are (well, most of them) finished. I don't want any kind of trouble with the writers of these fanfics. Just so you know, I'm not claiming I wrote them, it's just they're so funny I thought readers might want to laugh without actually having to read the whole f-fic. Please don't be mad! I wrote the title of them so anyone who is actually interested in the whole story can look them up with ¨search¨! Have fun!

P.S.: if any author has anything against this, just tell me and I'll remove it immediately, ok? Bye!

Ok, ahora en español. Para evitar discrepancias, declaro públicamente ante cualquier lector que yo no escribí estas historias, me limite a tomar párrafos de las mismas para hacer un compilado de los mejores momentos de Inu para alegrarlos! No quiero ningún problema por esto, así que si algún autor tiene algo en contra, avísenme y lo saco inmediatamente, ok? Chaus!


	2. Chapter 2

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I dare you

"I mean, could you imagine a sophisticated, kind hearted, non possessive, not aggressive, not pushy, and an all around good person type of Inuyasha?"

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el hijo de la oscuridad

Dante: Algo anda muy mal. Pero aún así creo que debemos ir.

Inuyasha: No estoy seguro.

Dante¿ el gran Inuyasha tiene miedo?

Inuyasha¿el gran monje vampiro quiere que le patee el trasero?

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El hijo de la oscuridad

Inuyasha: Según los amigos de este anciano..

Myoga: Este anciano puede patear tu trasero cuando lo desee...

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El hijo de la oscuridad 

Myoga: Si, dentro de tres días ocurrirá la luna roja, ese es el momento señalado en los libros.

Miroku¿es algo que ocurre cada mil años o algo así?

Myoga: No, cada 5 años.

Miroku: Entonces ¿por qué no lo intentaron antes?

Myoga: Yo que se.

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Blood Lust

"Mhm..too tired. Let me sleep." Miroku mumbled again.

"Okay you ass. No sleeping." Inu Yasha ground out.

"Too TIRED!" Miroku shouted childishly.

Inu Yasha glanced at the coffee in his cup holder and got an idea.

"Okay fine go to sleep." He told Miroku.

Once he heard Miroku's snoring, he reached into the cup holder and pulled out the _hot _coffee. He whistled innocently pouring the coffee into Miroku's lap.

"OUCHIE! OW! OW! OW! OW!" Miroku shouted in agony. "INU YASHA!"

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Blood Lust

"Hello boys." Kagura greeted as they stepped out the car.

"Do you have any paper towel?" Miroku asked, glaring at Inu Yasha.

Kagura smirked. "Did little Miroku have an accident?"

"No, little Inu Yasha poured coffee on my lap while I was sleeping!" Miroku told her while mimicking her voice.

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Blood Lust

"Do do do do do Inspector Gadget, Do do do do do do do, do do do do do do do do do, Do do do do do Inspector Gadget, Do do do do do do do!"

"Kagome, you're supposed to answer the phone, not sing along with it!" Ayame shouted.

"Oh, right." Kagome said grabbing the cell phone and answering it, "Hello, you've got Kagome Higurashi."

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Blood Lust

_Brinnng Brinnng_

"What the hell?" Inu Yasha said, snapping out of his trance like state.

"It's the telephone you idiot, you're supposed to answer it!" Kagome spat.

"Oh, right..." Inu Yasha muttered

**----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**I dare you**

Kikyo grabbed Kagome's shoulders, shaking her violently. She yelled loudly into Kagome's ear. "Wake up! Baka! Baka! Wake up!"

Kagome woke again briefly to whisper to Kikyo. "Shhhhh, I'm trying to sleep...zzzzzzzz"

With a murderous look in her eye Kikyo stomped downstairs. She filled a bucket with cold water, muttering incoherently. Taking the bucket up the stairs she barged into Kagome's room. She was surprised to find Kagome dressed, brushing her hair in front of her mirror.

"You should knock before entering people's rooms!" Kagome snapped, then noticing the bucket. "What are you going to do with that?"

"I was going to wash your windows." Replied Kikyo sarcastically.

"Oh, we don't have time for that, we're going to be late."

Kagome practically bounded out of her room, bursting with energy. She called over her shoulder to Kikyo. "You look so tired! You should sleep more!"

Kikyo just stood in the middle of Kagome's room, muttering again and again. "Must not kill! Must not kill! Must not kill!"

**I dare you**

The teacher then asked Sango to present her speech. Sango walked to the front of the class still muttering about perverts. She started the speech the whole while glaring at the unconscious Miroku. "Since I was small I've always wanted to be a spy or an assassin." She finished glaring pointedly at Miroku.

Miroku regained consciousness, only to find the eyes of all the class on him. He panted loudly. "I just pant pant had the scariest dream pant pant this monster that looked like Sango tried-"

Miroku was cut off when a stapler hit him straight in the face. Sango stood in front of the class trying to look innocent. The teacher thanked her and invited Kagome up next.

**I dare you**

Kagome and Sango got their lunches out of their lockers, walking to the cafeteria they saw an enraged Inuyasha punching and kicking his locker. Kagome smirked at him calling over her shoulder. "So Inu-baby, already training to be a samurai?"

Inuyasha continued to beat-up his locker, pretending the metal surface was Kagome. After a few more minutes he gave the locker one last kick for good measure. Leaving behind a mangled pile of metal in his wake.

The Janitor walked by the lockers calmly making a note to order a fourth locker for Inuyasha.

**I dare you**

Suddenly Miroku started to laugh evilly. He turned to Inuyasha pointing to his chest. "I. Dare. You. To ask Kagome out! ehe heh heh!"

"No! I dare you to profess your love to her!" Inuyasha picked up on Miroku's idea.

"I dared you first!"

"I double dare you!"

"No I do!"

'NO I DO!"

"NO I DO!"

"Gentlemen, Gentlemen." Sesshomaru interrupted. "Why not change these empty dares into a bet?"

Inuyasha and Miroku glanced at each other. "Yah..." Inuyasha said. "Who ever gets Kagome to...fall in love with him first wins."

"If I win I get to drive Miroku's new car for the rest of the year." Inuyasha said.

"And if I win?"

"In the unlikely chance you win, you get my little black book. Full of phone numbers of all the girls in the school and more." Gloated Inuyasha. He knew there was no way Miroku would back down now.

"Deal." Miroku shook Inuyasha's hand.

Sesshomaru smiled secretly. "Let the troubles begin..."

**I dare you **

Kagome huddled in a corner screeching so the whole bus could hear. "AHHHHHHH! Don't touch me! Ewwww! Pervert! I don't even know you! STOP TOUCHING ME THERE!"

The bus driver stopped the bus and stomped to stand in front of Inuyasha and Kagome. He grabbed Inuyasha out of his seat and looked at the sobbing Kagome.

She looked innocently at the bus driver and said hiccupping gently. "H-he touched me."

The bus driver enraged by someone taking advantage of such a sweet and innocent girl. He dragged Inuyasha to the front of the bus.

"This'll teach you!" he said as he opened the bus doors and tossed Inuyasha onto the ground.

Kagome smiled and gave the victory sign to Inuyasha as the bus once again started down the street.

**I dare you**

"But Sesshoumaru, I thought you were a drug dealer." Sango exclaimed.

"Nope, sorry to dissapoint you." Sesshoumaru replied.

"What about the baggies of white powder?" Inuyasha asked.

"Cornstarch."

"The colourful pills?"

"Candy."

"The suspicious dried green plants?"

"Oregano."

"You really AREN'T a drug dealer?" Kagome asked.

"No."

**Saigo el momento de la muerte**

InuYasha se levantó rápidamente, y antes de correr hacía la puerta, atropellando a la profesora y cuanto tuviera delante, le arrojó un libro a Miroku, golpeándolo en la cabeza muy fuerte.

- ¡AYYYYYYYY! – exclamó frotandose con cuidado la cabeza y dejando al descubierto un chichón - ¿Se puede saber por qué hiciste eso? Me duele Me duele Me duele Me duele Me duele Me duele Me... – calló al ver que InuYasha levantaba un brazo con otro libro todavía más grueso y decidió, por su propio bien, seguirlo.

**Bad Bets**

"Hey mom, I gotta steal Inuyasha away from you for like five minutes okay?" Kagome asked, more stated, as she grabbed Inuyasha and rushed him upstairs be fore her mom could answer.

"Well I hope you two aren't getting an early start on my grandchild!" Miss Higurashi called before Kagome could slam her door shut.

"Stupid mom, getting stupid ideas," Kagome muttered before she went to go pick up something from the top of her dresser.

**Bad Bets**

"Please tell me you are going to wear that and not me," Inuyasha said worriedly, he was not going to wear that, no he would not.

"Oh what ever do you mean? I possibly couldn't wear this. It isn't my style but look like it would fit you. Don't ya think?" Kagome asked as she picked up the article of clothing and fingered. This would be the greatest thing ever to see him wear this at school.

"No I don't think," Inuyasha said looking around the room to find a place to escape.

"Well I think _slave _it would fit you perfectly now go and change into it in the bathroom and come right back in here or else I'll have to take drastic measures, because you know what I still have?" Kagome asked innocently.

Inuyasha gulped before answering,"What?"

"I still have the pink tutu and the ribbons and I think I might have a pink leotard to go with it, now I don't think we want a repeat of what happened in sophomore year, now do we?"

"No we don't," Inuyasha said before picking up the clothes and running to the bathroom.

"MWAHAHAHA!" Kagome laughed loudly not being able to hold it in anymore.

**Bad Bets**

"Hello, Takahashi residence, Izayoi speaking, how may I help you?" Izayoi's voice came through the phone.

"Hey mom, you said you wanted to speak to Kagome," Inuyasha said still blushing thinking about what his mom had told him earlier.

"Oh yes, are you at her house now, let me speak to her," Izayoi said happily to the phone.

"Here she wants to talk to you," Inuyasha said handing the phone over to Kagome looking the other way.

"Hello," Kagome said into the phone, she didn't really want to know what she was about to say to her.

"Kagome dear, how are you?" Izayoi asked yet again cheerfully.

"Um…I'm fine, how are you?" Kagome answered shakily.

"I'm happy, so I hear that Inuyasha has to be your slave for five days, now if you are going to do any hanky panky with him I advise protection because we don't want any little Inu's running around now do we?" Izayoi asked still as happily as ever.

"No, no I wasn't going to do the _hanky panky _with him," Kagome answered back recovering, well not really, from the shock. How come mothers have to be so perverted?

"Riiiight child, and if you are going to do any of the real freaky stuff, you know like handcuffing to the bed or-" Izayoi was quickly cut of by Inuyasha taking the phone away from Kagome and him answering.

"Mom I told you before we weren't going to do that," Inuyasha yelled angrily into the phone.

"Son, no need to get mad," Izayoi said in a stern voice, "Well tell Kagome bye and give her a kiss for me alright," Izayoi said happily.

"Whatever mom bye," Inuyasha said, why did the world hate him?


End file.
